Towards the beginning of Humanae Vitae Pope Paul VI describes the four characteristics of married love – or rather, the characteristics that married love should have.
Firstly, married love must fully be “human.” That is, it must involve the whole person, the “compound of sense and spirit,” and cannot be merely “a question of natural instinct or emotional drive.” Thus, it must be an act of the “free will,” so deep that it can “survive the joys and sorrows of daily love” and also to grow, “so that husband and wife become in a way one heart and one soul, and together attain their human fulfillment.”
Secondly, married love must be “total.” It should be based on a deep “friendship” in which “husband and wife generously share everything.” Within this total love, one spouse does not love the other for what he “receives” but rather “for the partner’s own sake.”
Thirdly, married love must be “faithful and exclusive.” While at times this may be difficult, it is “always honorable and meritorious,” insists the pope. “The example of countless married couples proves not only that fidelity is in accord with the nature of marriage,” he added, “but also that it is the source of . . .”
